15 November 2013 - Exploring the middle reaches of the Swan River

Moalinup will be remembered as the place where I had my first breathalyser test. Notwithstanding the fact that I had to travel 10,000 miles for the test it will always be a reminder of the wonderful place names here. In the dialect of the local aboriginal people, place names ending with the suffix 'up' describe somewhere with water and/or a meeting place. It's a thoroughly practical way to pass along meaningful information along with a place name. In WA this has led to some wonderful names still in use. Joondalup, Kakaroomup, Bandyup and Koolyanobbing (a place of hard rocks, I know it doesn't end in 'up'  but it amused me! ) are just some that we spotted. What makes them all the more surreal is that they are juxtaposed with place names like Baskerville, Brigadoon, Herne Hill and Guildford. Wierd and wonderful.

Which can't be said of much of the Swan River Valley, sadly. We used our last full day in North Perth to explore the middle reaches of the Swan River, leaflets for which promised museums, lovely river views and a feast of foodie delights. I have noticed that I have used the adjective ‘underwhelming’ a little too often when describing our activities in this area but I'm afraid that it best describes today as well. Far too often venues described as places of interest were nothing more than cafes, food outlets and booze shops. Hopefully, as time goes by, we will become a little wiser to this.

So much chocolate, so little time.

The day was not completely without merit though, a visit to the Margaret River Chocolate Factory (yes, I know, we were on the Swan River, don't ask) was good fun. Lots of free samples were available and we made full use of them. Though not as thoroughly as a large Chinese family which queued repeatedly for large handfuls of chocolate buttons. Now I should be the last person to pass judgement on fellow chocoholics but crikey this bunch put me to shame. Even the toddler must have eaten close to 300g.

Rabbits and Fo. I'll leave you to decide which is which.

Later, my juvenile shotgun rider insisted that we stop at the Swan River Cuddly Animal Farm, she really is regressing. The combination of soiled straw, urine, flies, 35c temperatures and a $15 entrance fee failed to excite me in quite the same way. Fo darted off to get tactile with guinea pigs, rabbits, chickens, goats and wallabies while I, once again, retreated to a shady spot with my trusty Ipod to listen to some Kip Moore (I know, more country music). At least here all I had to contend with were hordes of flies. She emerged later looking very pleased, beats me why. Perhaps she was telling me that I don't hug her enough. Note to self, must hug wife more if it allows me to avoid places like this.

What do you think? Pan fried or a good stew?

The rest of the day passed in a wearisome blur so I won't elaborate further, you've got the UK weather to depress you without me making things worse.

My breathalyser test was negative by the way, seemingly much to the annoyance of the young Irish policeman who stopped me. Tomorrow we pick up a different hire car (one with a $50 rather than the $3,500 accident damage excess that Hertz applies) and head south to the Margaret River wine region.

Fine wine gets better with age; I get better with fine wine.